Gone but Not Forgotten

I am leaving Hartsvegas (what the teens call Hartsville....I have no idea why....they obviously have NEVER been to Vegas) this am for five fun filled days in THE HOLY CITY (that would be Charleston (not Rome) you people) with my Coker peeps.

Two of them, Pugh and Crews (these are their maiden last names) came here yesterday from Hampton, Virginia (be sure you say that with a Southern accent). My husband cooked ALL DAY in preparation. (He wants to be sure they tell the rest of the "girls" (who are now 65+) what a wonderful catch he was since he dated 55% of our class.) I mean he was out at their car in 99 seconds to pick up their baggage and bring it up to their rooms. The Hilton doesn't have that good of service; and their bell hops want tips.

I did find out Crews is one of my faithful blog readers. She has read every one! Thank you Linda. She is a retired first grade teacher. First grade teachers are made of gold! You have that on good authority! Mary Elese has read the blog once. There you go. She was a Million Dollar Real Estate Agent....what do they know. I can talk trash about her. She will never know :) She needs hearing aids. So does her husband.....actually Jim has them and doesn't wear them. Linda's husband also has THEM AND DOESN'T WEAR THEM. Curtis has them and wears them.....that makes him MR. Wonderful. (the fact that he can't hear with them....is a bit of a downer in my estimation)

By the way, Ashli Wayne and Todd, your father was on the front of the Florence Morning News last week advertising AAA Hearing Aids......Since Granny didn't notice and we know how she reads ever single piece of type in the paper we can hope no one else noticed. I really think it is not a good thing for them to use him as a role model since WE KNOW he still can't HEAR...but who am I to tell them???? Since he isn't getting paid one thin dime for being their spokesperson??

Anyway Loyal followers.....I will be back on the 3oth with more fun and foolishness....and I will tell all that went on at the Class of 65 Get together in Charleston so Tune in Then.

Oh, Say Can You See

My sweet, funny husband came in the den singing HIS version of America. America this morning. I say His Version because he does not know all the words to ANY song....Not even HAPPY BIRTHDAY. But that just makes it funnier.

We watched America's Memorial Day in Washington (or whatever is is called). We always watch these programs on the Fourth of July, Labor Day, and Memorial Day. They are great. They make me homesick for my hometown, Washington. Which any true native knows is NOT called (D.C.) PLEASE!

When they play the medley of the service anthems I sing everyone. I doubt a single school child in America today knows a single one....unless his parent is in the Armed Forces. I learned them in.......Elementary School......and we didn't have a .....Music Teacher.....our regular teacher taught them and she didn't have.......records......cd's......or a ....piano......go figure.

In yesterday's paper, child psychologist John Rosemond wrote about the myth of smaller classes and more money. He says that in the 1950's and 1960's teachers had as many as 50 kids in their classes (one poor first grade teacher had 95) and their achievement scores were consistently higher than any we see today. Why we ask? The children came to school prepared to learn. No, they didn't know their ABC's. No, their parent's didn't do their homework with or for them. The parents just showed interest in what they learned at school that day.

I went and looked at my 6th grade picture. 35 kids and I went all through elementary school with the same 35 kids. We had no cafeteria. The library was one wall in a classroom. We did not have an art, music or PE teacher.Or a resource officer or a guidance counselor. or a school bus.And I would bet every one of us graduated from college and most of us have at least one master's degree. My parents certainly never did a project for me. At most Mother called out my spelling words. Daddy tried to help me with multiplication one time until we were both in tears.

Oh, well.....back to Memorial Day....I will remember....our friend Jon Cook who became a quadriplegic in 1966 in Vietnam. Curtis Great-Grandfather John Evans who was injured in the Civil war and all those in Harms Way today so that you and I can have a picnic and worship our God (or not). Thank you!

Miracles on Bush River Road

My son, Todd, and his family are moving next Friday from Columbia, SC to Moncks Corner, SC.
For the past 8 or so years he has been running a restaurant/ store at the Central Corrections Institute (aka Prison). The Blind have a contract with the state to run the "concessions" in State and Federal buildings. (This means the vending machines on State and Federal Highways as well..... this cracks me up.....I mean duh....blind people can't drive....so uh....how are they going to fill up those vending machines.....makes no sense....but then we ARE talking about a GOVERNMENT program)

Anyway back to Todd. His job was going fine until his cook left grease on the stove and set fire to the kitchen. Turns out the system to extinguish the flames had never been hooked up when the kitchen was built back in 1958. And they didn't want to do it now....so NO MORE COOKING. SO HE HAD A RESTAURANT HE COULDN'T COOK IN. Kinda hard to make money just selling chips and drinks. He and Rose prayed about it and decided to move back to her parents home in Moncks Corner that was available and free.

Problem was. Selling their condo in Cola with the current housing market.

Solution: Prayer.

God brought them renter this week who wants to rent the condo for the mortgage price including the regime fee and is willing to paint the place and refurbish it in his free time (he is single and a handyman with handy friends). To top it off....He works for Terminex......They have had a continual battle with the critters.....I mean does God rock or what! Praise Him People!

It is win...win...they will still own a condo....and it will still be paid for by someone else...awesome!

The Great Bubbette

The top pic is not the clearest but it shows a young Bubba and Bubbette with their deceased son Robert. The bottom picture is their grown family minus daughter Susan's ( on Bubba's left) two adopted sons. Susan's youngest daughter Ali is also adopted. The handsome young gentleman to Bubbette's right is Herbert Stelwyn Gates the III (aka Bert) and his wife Kathy. In front of Bert are his children Herbert Stelwyn Gates IV (aka Buddy) and Jenna. Jenna is a Sophomore at Duke so this picture is a little dated.

Bubbette you will need to convene the fam for a new pic. Perhaps when we do the family reunion you called me about this summer we can do individual family pics and one big pic. How about that?

Back to Bubbette. Warning......Bubbette....I will probably tell more than you want anyone to know so you might want to stop reading now. When I met Bubbette, she was called Dee Dee. She was about 16 or 18. She was my brother's girlfriend. The only one I ever met. She went to the University of Maryland and HAD HER OWN CHRYSLER CONVERTIBLE. Back in the day, a Chrysler was like a Cadillac....very high status. She also had a fur coat....how I know this stuff I don't know. Her family lived year round in the community where my family had a beach cottage. Her dad was FAMOUS for cooking and eating BOILED PEANUTS which most people thought were YUK. (He was actually from South Carolina I later found out.)

Well, Buddy and Diane got engaged and the next thing I knew her family had moved to the other side of the tracks so to speak. My family never told me ANYTHING (I think they thought I MIGHT tell someone) so I had no clue why until a hundred years later when Diane and I talked about it. No more Chrysler. Her Mom went to work....I can't remember where. I remember Diane telling me her Dad threw all their clothes out in the yard.....and he left town for California. He was not at their wedding...and as far as I know was never seen again. Diane's Mom was left to raise three college age children herself. (and her sister Emma moved in also)

Diane's Mom, Betty, was a Hoot. She had the best sense of humor....I think she was the first person I met who had one other than my aunt Clara who died when I was 12. Diane learned to be a survivor from her Mom. Once Bubba became a Doc Diane never had to do without financially but she has had other hardships and the woman can flat out cope! She can pack up a house and sell it and buy another one a gazillion miles away with out batting an eye. (and she will get the best price on both) The woman has cooked breakfast for my brother every day of her fifty plus years of marriage.....and made his lunch and supper. We are not talking heating a can of ravioli, we are talking fillet Mignon with Bearnaise sauce, pasta primavera, asparagus roasted with garlic, baked Alaska (she really cooked that for ME one time).

Bubbette has been my ROLE MODEL of what a WIFE and MOTHER should be. Lots of hugs and kisses for her husband and kids. Lots of praise for them. Unfailing good cheer when anyone else would kick them in the b-u-t-t! (I mean r-e-a-r!)

So hears to you Bubbette......may you live at least as long as I do....and on the same street in heaven so we can visit a lot more than we have on earth....and if I told anything you didn't want told.....call me quick and I'll take it out.

More Bubba

I forgot to mention one of the things I am most proud of about my Bubba. At the height of his profession (I mean he was driving a Beamer provided for him by his OBGYN practice) he tossed it all and went west to work at the City of Faith in Tulsa Oklahoma. Yep, that was the hospital that Oral Roberts built so that people from all over the world could come and be treated with faith and medicine.

My family and I went to visit one Christmas. I was so impressed. I had been a Christian since 1971. I am not sure when my brother accepted Christ but I had noticed definite signs during the previous five years or so. He began leading the choir at his very evangelistic Presbyterian church in Kempsville, Va. Reading his Bible. You know the signs.

Bubbette was on board with all of that....but selling their house and moving to Tulsa....not so much. (Both our families had been on the East Coast FOREVER; they had three teenagers....hello this is not the time to sell all and follow Jesus to some City of Faith.) I think she drug her feet two or more years before she followed Bubba there. BUT, dear readers, she will tell you now, IT WAS THE BEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO HER!

As you probably know, unless you live under a rock....the City of Faith did not last. Oral overestimated people's willingness to leave their families to go to Tulsa to receive medical care; even if it was Christian Medical Care. I think, (and these are all MY opinions and not those of the Oral Roberts Evangelistic Association OR my Brother) Oral over estimated Christan's willingness to give money to provide this care for others.

BUT that does not mean that it wasn't a GREAT idea or that my brother wasn't supposed to go there. I remember visiting the pharmacy at the City of Faith and seeing the pharmacist pray over the prescriptions as he gave them to the patients. Well.....DUH....what a great IDEA is that....and why don't we do that over our own medicines????

So Bubba.....my hat is still off to you...you left your fishing net in Virginia Beach and took off for Tulsa in obedience to what you felt the Lord was calling you to do......and that is ALL God asks of any of us! I'm so proud of to call you MY BUBBA!

PS....Now you know why Mom and Dad called my Walter Wenchel....if I know it....I tell it (and not always correctly....no holds barred.



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My Bubba and Bubbette

This is my oldest brother, Herbert Stelwyn Gates, Jr. He was ten years old when our parents adopted me. There were two other brothers between us. Paul Wiltshire and Wayne Robert. Paul died six months before I was born of spinal meningitis. Wayne is five years older than me.

As a child, Herbert S. Gates, Jr., was known as Buddy. As a granddad he is known as Bubba. Which is so funny. He is as un Bubba as you can get. The man went to Duke when he was 18; (he is a genius). He was an OB-GYN, he was a Phi Beta Kappa. He played the piano. Since he retired from medicine he started studying physics because he just never really had the time before. When he was in med school, and I was a child, I remember him sitting in the den studying his medical books and watching tv at the same time. (This method did not work for me while studying anything.)

I was in Bubba and Bubbette's wedding when I was 11. Junior Bridesmaid. Big Deal! It was such fun. Bubbette lived in Bay Ridge where our summer home (aka known as Paradise) was so the wedding was there. All my parents friends from New Jersey and New Hampshire and Washington came and stayed at the beach house and it was quite a party. (As an adult I now wonder how my mother kept from cracking up.....no air conditioning....no dishwasher....a kitchen the size of a small closet)

Of course B & B had the first grandchild....Herbert Stelwyn Gates, II....to be called Bert. I got to come stay with them in their apartment in Arlington, Va. one weekend. While Bubbette took Bubba in to do his residency early Sat. am I was in charge of the sleeping baby. Any one who knows me knows exactly what I did. All together now......"WOKE HIM UP!"

Did I know ANYTHING about babies? NO! I was the youngest of the entire Gates klan. I couldn't even figure out how to get that little disc thing out the the nipple turned around and inverted. It was a long 30 minutes until Bubbette returned and a while before I was allowed to babysit. (Five years I think.)

I did love being Aunt Donna to Bert and his Sister Susan. I was Mary Poppins to them in my mind anyway. We went to the movies. They were in my wedding. I decided I loved kids! (Still do!)

Anyway, Bubba and I were never home much together with the ten year age difference and him leaving for college at age 18. But in the last 20 years we have become closer and closer. He knows a lot about our family that I was to young to know. And I know stuff he missed by being grown and gone. We compare notes. We ask each other....do you remember the so and so's who lived such and such????

Bubba is a lot like my Mom. The strong silent type. Not going to bubble all over you, but he will be there when the chips are down.

Now Bubbette and I are like twins separated at birth. We laugh ourselves silly. We can do some crying. She has been the sister I didn't have. She taught me to swim in the ocean. She has given me tons of good advice. She has had my family to her house in every house they ever lived in even when Bubba was off flying his plane or up talking on his ham radio. She taught me to make long sleeve tshirts for my boys and do needlepoint, oh and water aerobics.

She can mess with those pots and pans as my husband says. (She is a great cook, and hostess, and mom and grandmother.) I will look for a picture of her to post.

Thank you Bubba and Bubbette for being my family.

Manic Monday

Back in the day, around the age 40, I began to be a little bit self aware. By that I mean, I finally figured out that when I got too stimulated I got silly, talked even more than usual, got irritable and couldn't sleep well. Once I even got my counselor to recommend a psychiatrist who could diagnose me. The psychiatrist just told me to come back when I felt I was in a manic mode.

The last couple days I began to recognize the symptoms reappearing. Irritable, check. Silly, check! Talkative, check! Not sleeping well, check. Spending money, check.

Do you think calling the manager over three times at Percy and Willies would be called irritable?
Even if you have three good reasons?

How about if you go into Target to get a $47 IPOD shuffle and you come out with $237 IPOD and docking station?

How about picking up a hitchhiker? Did that, too; this am.

The thing about it is; it is fun to be manic. You can get 1,000 things done in ten minutes. You are friendly and funny (at least to yourself). You can take sleeping pills and sleep even if you do get up at 5:30 or 6 AM.

So I went to see Cousin Ken, my husband's cousin and my physician. He has been a great gift to me. All other docs I've had in this town couldn't have picked me out of a line up, much less known my history. Ken talks to me like I am a colleague. He explains things; talks about the pros and cons. He has even let me come in on Sunday when I was in dire straights. It doesn't get any better!

Starting tonight I will be taking a medicine to help me get unstimulated. I can do this w/out meds but I have to have about a week without any engagements involving people. People stimulate me (not manually, of course). TV stimulates me; the newspaper can stimulate me when I'm getting manic.

I am like a hot air balloon.....but instead of heat....stimulation makes me get higher and faster. Its fun but not healthy.
Here's to good mental health!

My American Idols

Contestant number one is the lovely Hannah Chapman holding the microphone for her staring role at her church's Spring Musical. She was perfect for her role of Camp Director (even though she has never been to camp) This child can corral a room full of kids and make them sit still for her Geometry lesson. Did I mention she is Mathematically Advanced as well as musically talented?

The second contestant to her right wearing the number 23 football jersey is the multi-talented Gates Chapman (age 3 and "starring" in his second musical). This church believes in getting their kids on stage as early as possible.

Hannah also starred in the Christmas production. She remembers words to every song she's every heard (she gets that one talent from me.....the math ability comes from her great grandmother president of Winthrop University Math Club in 1934,35,36,and 37.)

Last summer I had Tuesday's with Hannah. She spent the day with me. We often (like all afternoon )played Rummikub (so she could show her superior math ability and beat my socks off). While we played we listened to oldies from the 50's and 60's. She now knows the words to "Lipstick Traces", Louie, Louie, Mickey and Sylvia's How you call your lover boy....and other great musical compositions.

Fortunately, her grandfather, Jim Hardee, has broadened her musical education with Country Music. The man might be a minister but he loves him some old country music. When Hannah returned from a day trip with him last Sunday she said: "If I never hear another Dolly Parton Song it will be too soon!"

So we are expecting Hannah to be on American Idol any day now. Gates really prefers directing the choir but if a microphone is available (or a hairbrush or any other similarly shaped object) he is all over performing. I may be the first Grandmother to have two Grandchildren competing on American Idol....hopefully that will include free tickets to all performances.

You may have surmised correctly that I am an American Idol Fan. This year has been "the bomb,dog" but I didn't like the week they sang rock songs. My children will tell you NO ROCK MUSIC was allowed in our house. You know, Satanic lyrics, subliminal messages....not at this house. They LOVE to tell about me driving our 6,000 pound station wagon back and forth over their MICHAEL JACKSON record when I found it. I ask you folks, was I right or what??? Subversive.....perverse..... you start listening to that and next thing you know you'll we wearing one glove and having plastic surgery....it's a slippery slope!

BUT I HAVE FOUND THE PERFECT VENUE FOR ROCK MUSIC......BOOT CAMP!

It just is the perfect beat for pumping iron and doing push ups, etc.... I call out to the instructor during each song....."Who is screaming this song?"

AC/DC, Fergie, White Heart, KISS, oh my goodness..... I am on a Slippery Slope!

By the way for all you Idol fans......Adam Lambert Rocks! (I just wish he'd keep his tongue in his mouth and quit emulating Gene Simmons (is that the right one all you rockers out there?)

Three B's and a D

Three B's and a D!

No...these were not my grades in high school or college. (I wish!)

This is MY Bible Study! Ha! This is our Bible Study Group. We have been together five and a half years now....boy time flies when you are having fun!

Left to right....Burney, Betty, Donnamo, Brenda....

We did have a Bobbie....but she dropped us. We liked being 4 B's and a D.

We have studies a lot of different topics over the years; right now we are doing Rick Warren's Purpose Driven Life. We'd all read it before, but not done the study with Rick's video.

Brenda has been teaching it in small groups for two years now and has seen great results.

People who did not know the Lord, or were estranged coming back to HIM! One whole family, grandma, daughter, husband, has reconnected....now that is awesome! And it has happened in the worst circumstances. Small crowded house, two crying toddlers, wandering around during the study. But these "hungry" people just tune in to God. I remember an old saying that "evangelism is just one hungry sinner telling another hungry sinner where to find bread" AMEN.

These girls are "the bomb" (just to show how hip I am). We laugh more than the law allows at a Bible Study. We are all within 3 years of each other in age...so we have many of the same problems. (incontinence, weight gain, husbands around the house, etc...)

Three of us have children and one has "adopted" a whole dysfunctional family who keeps her on the go morning, noon and night. Just this week she kept a 3 1/2 year old whose mother tried to commit suicide (50 Xanax) and is hospitalized with no one to keep this child. Who could only speak a word or so and couldn't pick a cat out of a children's book she read to him.

We do pray (after all the laughter).

Oh, I forgot to mention our silent partner....my dog Scout who is beside Burney's right shoulder.

This is her perch, unless she gets cold and has to go under an afghan which all the girls thinks it is funny to watch.

Scout comes out when we stand for prayer and hold hands....she stands in the middle of our circle and bows her head.

I also need to mention our caretaker....husband Curtis. He blows our walk, and five mile driveway, and steps and porch before each meeting. He also will vacuum the den and hall. He usually leaves the premises during the meeting but may stop by to say "hey" to "the ladies of the cloth".... I keep telling him these are NOT my quilting buddies....but he likes his little joke.

If anyone out there in blogland lives in Hartsville and wants to join our Merry Band....give me a call. There is always room for one more. Thursdays, 9:30am-11:15am. Except the first Thursday in ever month when I do meet with the real ladies of the cloth...my quilt guild.

Thank you Lord, for each of these ladies. Hear our prayers O Lord, Help us remember it is NOT about US....it is about YOU and doing your will while loving you with ALL our hearts.

My Dear Sweetest Pea

Guess what????? Your Dad got my scanner fixed! You are so Busted!

Do you remember making me this collage of pictures of us? I had it in a frame on my vanity for years until the glass broke and I put it in one of my 25 photo albums (arranged by year chronologically if there is any doubt out there about how a librarian would keep her pictures).

Fortunately, it doesn't come through very clear so our outrageous hairdo's and outfits don't show up as much as they could.

It just goes to show you were always a sweet and crafty daughter who knew how to make a gift a mother would treasure....ALWAYS!

I love you, baby girl!


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LIFE: Handle With Care

I wanted to give you another great read: Handle with Care by Jodi Picoult.

It is about a family with a child borth with OI (brittle bone disease). The infant had 7 broken bones in utero, 3 more from the birthing, then got into breating trouble and they had to cut her open and broke some more bones. Sounds like a real upper, huh? Really, it is a good reminder that others suffer from things we can't even comprehend while we are whining about
small stuff.

Case in point. Yesterday at the Free Medical Clinic where I volunteer on Wednesdays. The director, Kathy Bbbaxley, followed me to my car to share the fact that her daughter Amanda just got the results from her test to see if she has the gene that will render her completely helpless....she does. Her Dad is in the last stages (and it aint prettyville) her uncle and grandfather died the same excrusiating death from it....now just finished nursing school in January, just back from volunteering as a nurse in Africa, just engaged to marry the love of her life, she gets the death sentence. Unbelievable. Unexplainable. Just NOT Fair!

But the good news is the fiance...."manned up" still wants to marry her (over parental objections) and the wedding plans have begun.

More good news....she has 25 years before the disease should onset.....at age 50.

It blows my mind BUT you know we all have a death sentence....none of us knows when or how our time will be up. She has time to pack a lot of living into her 25 years and not fiddle-fart it away like most of us have done.

So consider your life today....are you using it, loving it, thanking God for every minute of health you have, having fun, showing those around you how much you love them?

I love the Last Lecture of Randy Pausch. The professor at Carnegie Mellon who when diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer....told us how to live and how to die. If you haven't heard it go to uTube and look for it. It is life changing. I'm going to watch it again and again next month...somehow it is so easy to forget eternity in light of TODAY.

Thanks listening....pray for Amanda, Kathy, Buddy, and Brad the fiance and his family.

To God be the GLORY!

Boot Camp

Well, Friday, I bit the bullet and went to Boot Camp at the Y.

I've been going to Pilates, and water aerobics, and Step....but held off on Boot Camp.

But it was awesome.....3 big weight lifter dudes, and a 35 year old in about my shape (whose husband was supposed to meet her in the class), and me.

When I came in, the MEN were grousing that women didn't take the class because they are wimps. Oh...that so fired me up!

A challenge!

So I did my dead level best to outdo them on everything!

When, halfway through, one MAN threatened to quit.... I told him, "if a 65 year old woman can do it so can you......MAN UP"

Now we have a bet on who will be back this Fri. I will be there!

For the downside, I could barely walk....Sat and Sun...from hopping up and and down on my step
to show off how fit I am (JOKE)

But really, I can feel my core getting stronger (Pilates term for midsection) I actually remember to sit up and hold my belly button in.....between classess......me....the woman who's first words from her mother were "Stand up straight....hold your stomach in" something I never mastered in 65 years.

Geronimo!.......I mean Donnamo!

Home Safe

Home Safe is another great read. It is by Elizabeth Berg. I don't know why it has the picture of a huge ostrich egg on the front with a blue jay standing on top ready to peck into the egg. Not funny. Don't those publishing people know that blue jays eat other bird's eggs?

Back to the book, it is about a woman living in Chicago whose husband has a stroke at the breakfast table one morning and dies. Age 49. The wife, Helen, was a writer but due to the shock of her husband's death she gets writers block and can't write. She also discovers her husband's retirement account had been depleted by $850,000. Read the book to find out the wonderful surprise awaiting her.

Yesterday, Mother's Day was a great day for me. My husband went to church with his mother; his idea, that pleased her very much :)

I taught Sunday School at our church and let the kids paint by blowing paint with a straw. (My teacher's guide suggested it....something related to the Holy Spirit blowing wherever it will. Not sure they got the spiritual connection but they sure did like the activity....and no one got paint on their Sunday Clothes...even though I didn't bring smocks as suggested. (Who has 10 smocks laying around the house?)

When I got home, hubs had vacuumed the whole downstairs....a chore I was planning to do after church. That man knows my love language....."ACTS OF SERVICE"

At five Granny came over, son Wayne, wife Niki, granddaughter Hannah and grandson Gates.
Hubs cooked his world famous Clemson BBQ chicken, yummo.

I love being with my family....any of it.....all of it..... so it was The Perfect Mother's Day especially because I had phone calls from my two other children. Affirmation....that's what it was :)

Where, Oh Where Did My Little Wrens Go????

Remember, my little Carolina wrens I wrote about a few days ago?

Yesterday, I noticed no ACTIVITY in and out of their nest.

Hmmmmmmmm.

So I peeked.........no baby birds either.......hmmmm....

Could they have flown away over night? Hmmmmmm....

Mid-morning, Hubs says look behind you.....

There was a SNAKE slithering up the brick.......headed.....you know where.........the empty nest!

I am so sad.

Those wrens worked their glutes off feeding those babies.......

Just so that swine snake could have them for breakfast.......

No wonder the Bible says God put Satan in the form of a serpent(snake)....

and what does Satan (aka Snake) do?

Steal........Kill.......Destroy!

Don't know where Mom and Dad Wren are. Perhaps they were consumed as they tried to fend off the killer.

Or maybe it happened while they were out searching for worms......

Or maybe they are in grief counseling.............. I hope it helps!

and now I know what happened to my Cardinal eggs.......there one day....gone the next!

I may need grief counseling!

What Mothers Want for Mothers' Day

I am making a big assumption here folks.....that I know what every Mother wants for Mother's Day.....validation!

We want to know you think we are a good mother. Even if we never made you a homemade birthday cake......or gave you a car....or sent you to college......etc......

Just do what my daughter did and find SOMETHING positive to say.

Oh, and tell her you are glad SHE is your mother (even if you aren't.....this is called a white chocolate lie.)

Focus on what she did right....even if she did a million and one things wrong....and continues doing them. She probably did TRY. She may not have known HOW to show you, or TELL you.
But I guarantee she did love you; no matter how messed up it looked.

My own mother, Pearl, just could not tell me she loved me. Before she died she even told me she couldn't say the words. But you know what......I KNOW she did by the things she did.

I have never met or talked to my natural mother (Yep, I am adopted as everyone on the planet probably knows) . But I KNOW she loved me. She gave me to a couple who could love me and provide me. When I see unwed teenage Mothers keeping their babies, I so want to tell them....do the hard thing...do the loving thing.....give that baby to a loving couple who can give the child a stable home! To me, it is selfish to keep the child.

So there is my rant on Mother's Day. How about leave a comment even if you disagree. According to my counter, a fair number of people read this thing. Who are you? Why do you read my blog? Hey, I'll count it as a Mother's Day gift if you respond.

PS....After you tell your mother everything I said, a gift certificate for a massage or pedicure will not go unappreciated! (Thank you, son!)

Mr. Greenjeans' Garden

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Mr. Greenjeans Lives Here

My husband is Mr. Greenjeans, Jr. Remember him from Kaptain Kangaroo?

Well, Hubs was green when being green wasn't cool!

Above are pictures (I say this by faith, not having uploaded them) of our new COMPOST garden!

Last year this time we were in England.....staying at rural B&B's. One of them the owner had a great compost pile and the best looking veggies (and flowers) ever.

My husband came home and started a compost pile.....which if you have ever had one you know it involves WORK! Turning the dirt, watering the thing, adding more compost, etc...

Then he built an above ground bed and filled it with said compost and planted tomatoes in it.

Then he planted lettuce (for the first time in his life) in a container.

We also have blackberries, strawberries, and RASPBERRIES (I love them but they are tres expensive).

I'm so glad I married Mr. Greenjeans!

(Pictures may be on next blog....this blooming thing won't load them)

Be Glad You Aren't a Bird

Imaginary picture of a Carolina Wren with a worm in it's mouth.

Once more my photographic skills astound you I know. My husband was SURE he got a good photo of the pair of wrens who have a nest under my little patio Alas....all the untrained eye could see was the lawn chair and ladder under which she had her nest hidden.

I have spent most of the day on my patio reading a great book.....DOGWOOD by Chis Fabry. In fact I started and finished it today it was so engrossing. Chris has a program on Moody Radio which I program into my day at 3PM if at all possible. I also read his blog. I thought DOGWOOD was a children's book (which he has written several) and so I didn't pick it up until today. I was very impressed with his writing. So as Randy Jackson on American Idol would say, "Check it out, dog!"

Meanwhile back at the ranch, I mean wren(CH) this couple of birds have flown in and out of the nest feeding their baby birds every couple of minutes. I had to think, if we think grocery shopping is exhausting we had better be very glad we aren't birds.....whew! I told my husband, I''ve killed those baby birds after two days of all that work. Where they are getting the worms is another thing. Not at Walmart for sure.

So for those readers who want to know what I bought for $91 on my big shop Monday.....drum roll.....Bread, English Muffins, Cheddar Cheese, Swiss Cheese, 6 things of yogurt, 1 package of pocketsized kleenex, two small pkgs of sugar free candy, dishwashing detergent, two toilet cleaners, two bathroom clearners, powdered sugar, brown sugar, cottage cheese, whipped butter, I Can't Believe its not butter, contact solution, Crest, 2 quarts of Tropicana, and that is all I can decode on the receipt. (You remember the hot dogs I'm sure).

Of the many entrants (2) Gabby from Rock Hill was the winner. Having guessed 5 items correctly. This person MIGHT have an unfair advantage since she grew up shopping with and for me.

Congratulations to The First Runner Up Mary Bailey who has a Wonderful Life Already and didn't need to win this to prove it.

The Scavenger Hunt

I went to the grocery store today. I don't mean I ran in and picked up a loaf of bread.
I took a list that had been building a week and did a major grocery shop.

Now for most of you that is an every week thing. Not me. Since I retired from teaching five years ago, Hubs (to use Kimberly's word) aka Curtis has been doing all the major grocery shopping. I think he loves it; and I have learned to tolerate not being in control of the groceries and the money that is spent on it.

It is good to go once every five years; it makes me appreciate him going :)

While I was crisscrossing the aisles at our Super Walmart, checking my list, looking for items that I have coupons for, AND trying to remember what was on the left hand side of the Eat This Not That Book brought home from the library.....it dawned on me, after 55 years of grocery shopping (minus the five years Curtis has done it)....it is a Scavenger Hunt!

Once in a very great while I have been a part of a Scavenger Hunt.....you know, someone gives you a list of things to find and you have a limited amount of time to round them up. The team that gets back with the most items in the shortest time with the most items... WINS! (That means YOU get to load them in the car, unload them and put them away...wooHooo!

Well, I consider myself a winner because I got out off the store with all but 3 items from my MEGA LIST and I got back change from my $100 bill. How much change? $1010.00

Boy, I couldn't wait to show my husband the cash register receipt.

Of course, it was a mistake but it sure was fun for a nano second. I mean I could get in Guinness Book of World Records....coming out of a SuperWalmart with $1,010 in CHANGE.

Did I mention I bought NO MEAT for that $90 (Oops, no meat except 2 pkgs of Ball Park All Beef Hotdogs that are a part of my husbands daily diet). No paper products! No cosmetics (unless you count toothpaste) No Clothing..... No Vegetables..... No frozen food......No Fresh Food.....No cookies, chips, or crackers!

Women of the world unite....we've got to make this grocery shopping FUN somehow.

So see if you can guess what those 31 items I bought were..... and I'll think up a prize for the person what gets the most items correct.

The Girls from Coker and Their 48 Year Friendships

I picked up The Girls from Ames A Story of Women and a Forty Year Friendship at the library today and I have had my head in the book ever since.

These "girls" formed their friendship while in high school in Ames, Iowa. Born in 1969, they are now about forty years old. All of them live in different areas of the country, but almost every year they reunite somewhere for four days.

The author, Jeffrey Zaslow, interviewed them individually and corporately, poured through their scrapbooks and diaries (with permission) and gives us his conclusions based on all of their input and the scientific data available about the friendships of women.

"...females with close female friends are far less likely to be lonely"

"....women tend to let their childhood and adolescent friendships go until their forties when their own children are more independent .....

What about this book resonates with me? I LOVE my girlfriends past, present and future.

AND I STAY IN TOUCH WITH THEM.....whether they like it or not!

Childhood friends are so precious.....my BFF, Leslie, and I reminisce about playing Toni dolls together, having secret hideouts in our neighborhoods, getting caught smoking by my mother, her teaching me to drive her mother's ever so cool convertible.....we have a bond no one else will ever have with us....she was the sister I never had.... Precious Memories!

High School Friends.....BTE Forever....our high school sorority.....formed by a bunch of us who weren't asked to be in any of the other sororities.... I still am in contact with two of you "girls" and we have other great memories....rush parties, joint meetings, skipping school, double dates, biology lab, Senior Prom......more Precious Memories!

College Friends......we confirm Jeff Zaslow's research.....we came sporadically to college reunions until our forties.....one of our classmates had a serious recurrence of breast cancer and a bunch of us went to Isle of Palms to celebrate her recovery with her. Now we get together almost every year somewhere. We don't share childhood memories but college memories. In thinking about the book, I realize at Coker we were like a very small town with no parents, just dorm mothers, and professors that we all had in common. You can mention anyone who was on staff or a student at Coker during our time there and everyone of us will know who you are talking about and can contribute something about them.

Now that we are older, ahem, we are turning 66 this year.....we share our woes over aging, our joys over grand parenting, losses of husbands (and boyfriends) and we LAUGH!

Zaslow says, "...a study that tracked 1500 women as they aged found that close friendships---even more than family ties--help prolong women's lives"

I could go on naming other groups of friends.....Women's Aglow.....Bible Study..... Job's Daughter's...... that have enriched my life but you get the picture.

Girlfriends are a Girls Best Friend......so take care of yours!